That’ll do, John Mayer. That’ll do.
So something mildly entertaining happened at One and One the other day. For the most part, I’ve given up on going out but it was a friend’s birthday and I hadn’t gotten my Beyonce on in a while so I thought, why not. I had taken a DayQuil earlier so I didn’t drink, but the medicine must have given me a little buzz because I started to feel the music. My hips were moving all over the place and once we made it downstairs, I was drunk in my cold medicine-stupor. Suddenly, Thong Song comes on and I just lose it. I got so excited, I started slapping my buddy’s ass on the dance floor. I don’t think many people noticed but I was swiftly reminded why I spend weekends with Netflix instead of Sisqo. Here are some spring picks for the nice weather ahead.
Something is missing.
What can fill this void in me?
Taco Bell breakfast.
I’m normally too excited about food to even remember to take pictures of it but everyone else at my table made sure I knew that it was of absolute importance to Instagram a shot at just the right angle, with proper spoon-placement (what??). So I gave in and snapped one to remind myself never to share dessert with girls ever again.
Oscar Wilde, how do you know so much about so much?
Margaret Atwood, The Woman Who Could Not Live With Her Faulty Heart.
And I’m looking at sales on Barneys.com. Priorities. Wish I had some Frosted Flakes.